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Ageism Is Prejudice Against Time and is a challenge in the gay male culture.

The words ageism and sexism have been used for decades, more so in the past years like in the women’s movement “Me Too”. The truth is; the behavior of the word “Ageism” been embedded in the male gay culture as far back as one can remember. In fact, labels were given to a successful older man dating a younger man as a sugar daddy dating a toyboy.

Sexism within Sexism: In the male gay culture, there are young gay men obsessed with their physique, working out on a regular basis, eating healthy, dating, and attracting the same species. Most often relationships do not last and young buffed men get older finding keeping up with the younger look is no longer sustainable. In fact, studies showed this syndrome is what leads to lots of cases of depression on self-worth.

Gay older single Men: this group has the biggest challenge. They are no longer the younger vibrant buffed male species and feeling unfit in the arena they once were deeply engaged. In fact, they feel unacknowledged in most communities beyond a certain age, until they move to Palm Springs, California. Palm Springs is one of the most supportive cities to gay men and especially to elderly gay men. Sexism does not exist much in Palm Springs and if it does, it is not felt as in other cities.

Love at 1st sight: Take Tom Ford fashion designer icon, married to Richard Buckley. One of the very few successful gay marriages in Hollywood. Yet according to ageism and the male gay culture, Tom and Richard’s marriage is always questioned to the nature of their age difference as opposed to its true nature “Love at 1st sight”.

Then came the internet: Is age requests among gay men in Internet personal ads “ageism” or simply being selective to one’s own personal desires? There was a recent ad that read “I am only interested in men over 40 and under 55”. I suppose if one was 39 years old or 56 years old, this makes him unqualified.

Are we falling in love with a number, a concept, an idea, or an image of what someone one suppose to be? or are we wanting to fall in love with a human being that offers more than a six-pack or a fancy car?

Currently, there is a single gay men’s zoom conversation held on Mondays at 5:00 pm PST. All information is listed on FB group page https://www.facebook.com/groups/675858123247898/